Mental coping and self-protection strategies
Defense mechanisms are unconscious psychological processes that prevent anxiety-provoking conflicts from becoming conscious. As a result, denial, normalization, projection, and somatization may occur.
Denial means that a person does not acknowledge something that has actually happened, or its significance, because it is too difficult to process. For example, a person may not want to admit that their partner behaves violently, even though violence is occurring. The goal is to protect the mind from overwhelming emotions or anxiety.
Normalization means that a person begins to see abnormal or harmful behavior as “normal” or acceptable. For example, if constant arguing or violence occurs in a family, a person may think: “This is just normal family life.” The aim is to reduce anxiety and cope with everyday life, even if the situation is harmful.
Projection means that a person transfers their own feelings, thoughts, or traits onto another person, often because they feel too difficult to accept in themselves. For example, a person who feels anger may accuse their partner of being angry or aggressive. The goal is to protect self-esteem and reduce inner conflict.
Somatization means that psychological stress or anxiety manifests as physical symptoms in the body. Tension, fear, or anxiety may appear, for example, as stomach pain, headaches, or muscle tension.
Experiencing violence can cause many kinds of bodily and psychological reactions. These are natural coping mechanisms through which the body and mind attempt to protect themselves from a difficult experience. Reactions can range from freezing and dissociation to panic attacks. They are not signs of weakness, but the body’s way of processing extreme stress.
Being unable to do anything, which may appear to the perpetrator of violence as consent to the act.
This refers to a separation of the mind and body. For example, a feeling of observing events from outside oneself, or the mind being completely elsewhere than what is happening. One may lose memory, experience oneself or the surroundings as strange or unreal, and lose a sense of time and place.
This is an acute bodily reaction to threat, in which the body prepares to fight or flee. The body may react strongly, for example with heart palpitations, rapid breathing, and sweating.
- Flashbacks
- PTSD – Post-traumatic stress disorder
- Shame, guilt (self-blame), anger, grief
- Sleep disturbances
- Substance use, addictions
- Eating disorders
- Depression, panic disorder, anxiety disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorder
- Psychosomatic illnesses
- Revenge fantasies
- Self-criticism (as a safety behavior → sense of control, autonomy)
- Lowered self-esteem
- Self-destructive behavior
- Fear of social situations, phobias
- Withdrawal, avoidance behavior
What helps?
- Corrective relational experiences
- Transformation of traumatic memories into a narrative, socially shareable memories, as part of the overall life story
- Everyday functioning, self-care
- Therapy / processing the effects of violent experiences (on identity)
- Grief work
- Knowledge
- Self-compassion
- Forgiving oneself
- Practicing assertiveness skills
- Practicing setting boundaries and saying no
- Doing things that are important to oneself, dreaming
- Talking, writing, painting, making music, moving, etc.
- Seeing a doctor if needed
Sources:
Katja Myllyviita: Häpeän hoito
Anssi Leikola: Katkennut totuus
Lönnqvist et al. (eds.): Psychiatry
