Exercise: Five years ahead
Imagine that five years have passed and your situation is still the same.
- How do you feel?
- Are you happy?
- How have these past five years affected you?
- Is your ability to cope better or worse than before?
- Could you have done something differently?
- What kind of dreams do you have now?
- If you could give your present-day self one piece of advice from your future self, what would it be?
If you can imagine that, five years from now, with the situation unchanged, you would feel more exhausted, sadder, or more bitter, could you consider doing something about the situation right now, in this moment?
No one can ever change another person. If you are experiencing violence, no one but the person using violence can make it stop. However, it is possible to influence your own personal life. Everyone makes changes when they feel truly ready, but this exercise may help you take responsibility for your own well-being earlier. Help is always available, and the first step is often to talk about your situation with another person.
If, on the other hand, you imagined that you would be in a better place five years from now even if the situation stayed the same, you might ask yourself whether that is realistic under the same circumstances, five years older and carrying the weight of many years. If it is, how have you done it? Think about what your path has been like and what you have done differently. What kinds of practical actions or changes have taken place? Remember that you cannot stop violence. But could you begin the actions you have taken already today? What is your first small step?
